Honor sudden flashbacks

I despise flashbacks.

They come unannounced and uninvited. The actual flashback takes seconds but the damage can last for days.

I realized part of the reason why they were so devastating and the damage lasted so long was because the flashback has two parts:

1. The initial reaction to it which normally will be: sadness.

2. The secondary reaction to it which will be an assortment of emotions: 

-anger because I wish I hadn't remembered this 

-anxiety because I can't stop or control these flashbacks and I don't know when the next one is coming
-despair because I will never get to experience this with my loved one again (if it was the flashback of a happy memory)
-suffering because I'm re-living the bad again ( if it was the flashback of a sad memory).

Acknowledge all your emotions: yes it pisses me off that I remembered this, it sucks that I can't predict when the next flashback is coming (just like many other things in life that I can't predict), and I feel awful beyond words that my loved one is not here anymore.

Allow yourself to feel your feelings, if you need to cry, kick or scream do it. Don't try to fight or suppress your feelings. 

As they say: the only way out is through.